I really shouldn't say this, but I will. You're not nasty for pointing out a mistake, that's a good thing to do, it's the way you do it that's nasty. You really have to work on your delivery. I'm trying to not say this in a bad way, I hope I succeeded!
It is far better to point out a persons "mistake" by private message rather than publicly.
Of course how one phrases that private message is paramount. One does not want to appear so critical that the receipient takes offence.
I don't mind if someone points out a mistake to me publicly or privately...
It's HOW they come across that matters. Was there some politeness? Was it blunt and just cut to the point? Was it based on constructive criticism?
Mike
*****************************
EDIT:
Ohhhh....is it the thread where you pointed out the ebay mistakes but never described the mistakes and then got backlash for not explaining what the mistakes were? And even then took multiple responses to get you to explain the mistakes...
Yeah...that was not cool...Not cool at all. And on top of that it appears you already got banned from one forum for creating drama in threads?
Learn from your mistakes grasshopper...
M
David,
There was a very wise man from China that coined many words of contentment, one of which I believe was, "It is better to keep mouth shut and let people think you are ignorant than to open mouth and confirm it."
You are fast to mention someone's mistakes, but never offer a solution. You may not know it but every living person on earth makes mistakes and if they are like me, it is every day!
Mike
Moderator comment - Please keep the personal directed sarcasm down.
@CapeStampMan
I'd like to correct that as you said "You are fast to mention someone's mistakes, but never offer a solution", which examples can you give me, and I will try to correct these.
1898
To the respondee to my last comment,
Do some of your own research and figure it out yourself! I don't have enough time to waste trying to cover all of your fowl ups.
Mike
An oldie but goodie.
There is good advice being dispensed in this thread, but the flavor of irritation/lack of patience tends to dilute it. That is a shame, for the advice itself is valuable.
To those who are bottom line folk, and to those who are story tellers- know that to be heard you need to know to whom you are speaking. Mike is a bottom line guy, and David (1898) and Harvey are more the story tellers. Each has important info to share, but in their own way.
Their way is neither good or bad, just their way. The missing link is keeping in mind to whom one is speaking to. A good genral rule is to err on the side of patience, and giving the writer the benefit of the doubt. Between friends, we do this all the time. At SOR we are friends and family.
To those who are newbies, we are all strangers. Will Rogers (cowboy philosopher from another time) said "strangers are just friends we haven't met yet."
That's the SOR we need to keep in mind.
Dan C.
p.s. Welcome home Ian- you were missed
Good points Dan.
In my opinion knowledge is different than wisdom. Knowledge can easily be learned from others or from reading; it is often said that knowledge gets you a job, but wisdom gets you a life.
Wisdom is what helps you get along with others. Wisdom includes thing like empathy, compassion, and understanding how you are being perceived by others.
For me and when I get negative feedback, my first reaction can sometimes be emotional. It can be a bit of a struggle to not react in that emotional mode and remain grounded. But when I do, I find that people respond better and much drama is avoided.
So, I think that there are two primary ‘wisdom prerequisites’. First recognize that others are not responding to you well and it is creating issues. Second, fight the first emotional urges you might have and give yourself some time for the emotions to subside before making decisions.
Don
Candidate for a Pullet Surprise
by Mark Eckman and Jerrold H. Zar
I have a spelling checker,
It came with my PC.
It plane lee marks four my revue
Miss steaks aye can knot sea.
Eye ran this poem threw it,
Your sure reel glad two no.
Its vary polished in it's weigh.
My checker tolled me sew.
A checker is a bless sing,
It freeze yew lodes of thyme.
It helps me right awl stiles two reed,
And aides me when eye rime.
Each frays come posed up on my screen
Eye trussed too bee a joule.
The checker pours o'er every word
To cheque sum spelling rule.
Bee fore a veiling checker's
Hour spelling mite decline,
And if we're lacks oar have a laps,
We wood bee maid too wine.
Butt now bee cause my spelling
Is checked with such grate flare,
Their are know fault's with in my cite,
Of nun eye am a wear.
Now spelling does knot phase me,
It does knot bring a tier.
My pay purrs awl due glad den
With wrapped word's fare as hear.
To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should bee proud,
And wee mussed dew the best wee can,
Sew flaw's are knot aloud.
Sow ewe can sea why aye dew prays
Such soft wear four pea seas,
And why eye brake in two averse
Buy righting want too pleas.
Recently I pointed out a mistake here on SOR, one member said "I was nasty", is pointing out mistakes on SOR a mistake, and was I nasty for pointing out the mistake?
I found another mistake here on SOR, should I point out this mistake or just let it pass?
1898
re: Pointing out mistakes?
I really shouldn't say this, but I will. You're not nasty for pointing out a mistake, that's a good thing to do, it's the way you do it that's nasty. You really have to work on your delivery. I'm trying to not say this in a bad way, I hope I succeeded!
re: Pointing out mistakes?
It is far better to point out a persons "mistake" by private message rather than publicly.
Of course how one phrases that private message is paramount. One does not want to appear so critical that the receipient takes offence.
re: Pointing out mistakes?
re: Pointing out mistakes?
I don't mind if someone points out a mistake to me publicly or privately...
It's HOW they come across that matters. Was there some politeness? Was it blunt and just cut to the point? Was it based on constructive criticism?
Mike
*****************************
EDIT:
Ohhhh....is it the thread where you pointed out the ebay mistakes but never described the mistakes and then got backlash for not explaining what the mistakes were? And even then took multiple responses to get you to explain the mistakes...
Yeah...that was not cool...Not cool at all. And on top of that it appears you already got banned from one forum for creating drama in threads?
Learn from your mistakes grasshopper...
M
re: Pointing out mistakes?
David,
There was a very wise man from China that coined many words of contentment, one of which I believe was, "It is better to keep mouth shut and let people think you are ignorant than to open mouth and confirm it."
You are fast to mention someone's mistakes, but never offer a solution. You may not know it but every living person on earth makes mistakes and if they are like me, it is every day!
Mike
re: Pointing out mistakes?
Moderator comment - Please keep the personal directed sarcasm down.
re: Pointing out mistakes?
@CapeStampMan
I'd like to correct that as you said "You are fast to mention someone's mistakes, but never offer a solution", which examples can you give me, and I will try to correct these.
1898
re: Pointing out mistakes?
To the respondee to my last comment,
Do some of your own research and figure it out yourself! I don't have enough time to waste trying to cover all of your fowl ups.
Mike
re: Pointing out mistakes?
An oldie but goodie.
re: Pointing out mistakes?
There is good advice being dispensed in this thread, but the flavor of irritation/lack of patience tends to dilute it. That is a shame, for the advice itself is valuable.
To those who are bottom line folk, and to those who are story tellers- know that to be heard you need to know to whom you are speaking. Mike is a bottom line guy, and David (1898) and Harvey are more the story tellers. Each has important info to share, but in their own way.
Their way is neither good or bad, just their way. The missing link is keeping in mind to whom one is speaking to. A good genral rule is to err on the side of patience, and giving the writer the benefit of the doubt. Between friends, we do this all the time. At SOR we are friends and family.
To those who are newbies, we are all strangers. Will Rogers (cowboy philosopher from another time) said "strangers are just friends we haven't met yet."
That's the SOR we need to keep in mind.
Dan C.
p.s. Welcome home Ian- you were missed
re: Pointing out mistakes?
Good points Dan.
In my opinion knowledge is different than wisdom. Knowledge can easily be learned from others or from reading; it is often said that knowledge gets you a job, but wisdom gets you a life.
Wisdom is what helps you get along with others. Wisdom includes thing like empathy, compassion, and understanding how you are being perceived by others.
For me and when I get negative feedback, my first reaction can sometimes be emotional. It can be a bit of a struggle to not react in that emotional mode and remain grounded. But when I do, I find that people respond better and much drama is avoided.
So, I think that there are two primary ‘wisdom prerequisites’. First recognize that others are not responding to you well and it is creating issues. Second, fight the first emotional urges you might have and give yourself some time for the emotions to subside before making decisions.
Don
re: Pointing out mistakes?
Candidate for a Pullet Surprise
by Mark Eckman and Jerrold H. Zar
I have a spelling checker,
It came with my PC.
It plane lee marks four my revue
Miss steaks aye can knot sea.
Eye ran this poem threw it,
Your sure reel glad two no.
Its vary polished in it's weigh.
My checker tolled me sew.
A checker is a bless sing,
It freeze yew lodes of thyme.
It helps me right awl stiles two reed,
And aides me when eye rime.
Each frays come posed up on my screen
Eye trussed too bee a joule.
The checker pours o'er every word
To cheque sum spelling rule.
Bee fore a veiling checker's
Hour spelling mite decline,
And if we're lacks oar have a laps,
We wood bee maid too wine.
Butt now bee cause my spelling
Is checked with such grate flare,
Their are know fault's with in my cite,
Of nun eye am a wear.
Now spelling does knot phase me,
It does knot bring a tier.
My pay purrs awl due glad den
With wrapped word's fare as hear.
To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should bee proud,
And wee mussed dew the best wee can,
Sew flaw's are knot aloud.
Sow ewe can sea why aye dew prays
Such soft wear four pea seas,
And why eye brake in two averse
Buy righting want too pleas.